The days seem to fly by and I think about updating everyone and then another day passes. We are at 7 months post surgery. I have so many thoughts about where we are on this journey.
Here is the latest on Jerry's progress
Jerry is upright most days walking with a cane. Many times, even leaving it hanging on the dresser while he bobbles around the property. He gets around in our house well enough. What an amazing miracle to think back to 7 months ago when he couldn't move most of his body !! He walked 800 ft in therapy this week !! He makes it out to his shop and finds himself occupied with little projects and just a place to be, think and pray. I love the moments I walk in and see him sitting at the end of his workbench ,soaking up time with the Lord. Then there are days I walk in and he is sound asleep in his chair. He tries to fight off the sleepiness from the medications,though they usually win if he slows down. I have learned in the past few months not to hover over him and let him be. It's not easy, I have fears, I fear he falls or he tries to cut some wood and something goes wrong with his hand control and he injures himself. Or he climbs up a ladder and his legs don't work the way he wants them too.!! I send the kids out at different times to "check on Daddy". I want him to have that independence but, I Don't want to go backwards... That is my fear, one wrong fall or injury and he has to go back in to the spinal unit and we have a setback. I have trusted God this far , yet, this is a daily struggle I have to surrender over and over.
The cold weather is another obstacle with his spinal injury. His thermometer doesn't work right and he is always cold. The tremors - actually called clonus, that he has dealt with for years, gets pretty bad, especially when he is cold. They cause him to shake uncontrollably for a few seconds to a minute. We seem to have the heat on higher than normal this year, just to accommodate his thermometer. Definitely thinking about a wood stove for next winter.
Our hearts are overwhelmed at all the ways we have been carried through this year. We know that the Lord has provided for us in such a multitude of ways through so many of your hands. Thank you for being part of God's story for Us, this past year. Jerry only did one horse in 2015 = 50$. This fall he was able to get on Disability. I write this to remind myself and whomever reads this (especially our kids) that the storm may come and it might seem impossible to go one more day, but when you have nothing but the Hope of Jesus to hold onto, He will not let you go.
It has not always been easy this past year to see how things were going to work out. It still isn't always easy , yet, I do know that our needs have always been met and I have Trusted the Lord to provide in all ways. The monetary gifts took away the worries of how to make ends meet, allowed for us to function in some kind of normalcy, allowed us to put gas in the car to get from one point to the next, sometimes even the only possible way we would have seen the kids was through those gifts when we were apart. Keeping the mortgage paid, the utilities and the groceries. The meals that have been provided over the past year have always been such a blessing, especially when I was not able to be "mom at home". The numerous ways our fridge and freezer and pantry have never went empty, even when there were days when I wasn't sure when we would get groceries next, there always seemed to be an answer the next day. A reliable vehicle, a roof for the shop, an electric recliner, a camper for company this summer, a family get away, adventures for the kids..... the Blessings list is longer than all of this and We are beyond grateful for all the ways you have helped us this year
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Some of the most impacting Blessings, though, were the words spoken to us, the phone calls, the text messages, the cards with words of Love and encouragement. The Prayers that really lifted us up and carried us. So many times , it felt like it was going to be too hard to do the 'next thing' and then a word of encouragement and love came through in some form and that was just what Jerry or I needed most at that moment to keep going. Your Time is valuable, and when you take a moment to spend time on someone else it becomes even more valuable. It might seem insignificant, or even bothersome, yet you were prompted in some way ,in your heart to take time, your precious time, and share a moment with someone else. That gift of time has been the greatest Blessing...I know for me there were times this past year when I felt so unsure of how to respond or what I needed to do next. I was alone, the kids were home, Jerry was in a hospital bed and I was left to make decisions and try to make sure things were in order or kids were all fine and I would receive the gift of time from someone in some way, and that was the reminder that "No, I am not alone". We have a circle of friends that reach far and wide and the Lord chose each of you to be a part in our story and we are so thankful for each of you .
2015 has ended and I can say it has been one of the hardest years of our life, but it was also one of the Grandest years, as well. Our journey has a long ways to go and I hope you will continue to be a part of it. Much Love to you all ~ Tammy and family
Here is a video of a song that has become my anthem this past year, May it encourage you .
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