A New Vision

I have tried to write something for the past two weeks but keep coming up with lost thoughts.  So much is happening each day, good and bad, that  it becomes overwhelming to just process the day.

Last Tuesday, we met the Neurosurgeon whom will be doing Jerry's surgery.  I new without a doubt that if a young Resident Surgeon walked through the door, I was bolting, draggin Jerry along with me.  I needed to see experience, I have put my trust in the Lord for placing the right Dr at the right time to do this surgery for Jerry, but I knew what my expectations were.  As Jerry eyed all the prosthetic spinal hardware displayed in the office, I was going over all the questions we had.  The Dr. was already seeing us after hours , which was quite accomadating to the need to proceed soon with treatment.  As the Surgeon walked in, I pictured him with a football tucked in his arm, rushing past a defense line, plowing them down one at a time.  I really could not picture him with a scalpel in his hands, prepared to make incisions on my best friends neck !! I listened to him talk and found his gentleness in his words.  His care for what was to be done, the team he had arranged to come alongside of him  and the critical-ness of Jerry's spine.  I was thankful for this man, this professional whom would be handling the delicateness of my man.
Have you ever seen an MRI ?  It is a deeper image than an xray and is quite fascinating. I am going to share part of Jerry's MRI, to show the extent of his damage.  A little knowledge- the spinal canal runs on each side of the spinal cord and the cord is inside of the vertebrae to keep it protected.  When you see this picture you will see the white lines on the both sides of the spinal canal.  However as you go down his spine you will see where that canal is not visible.  The vertebrae are constricting his cord with very little space left. This is his Cervical spine- neck area.

Part of c4-c7 will be removed during surgery to release pressure on the spinal cord.

We understood it was damaged, but a picture relays the message so clearly.  Once we saw this image, we really understood how Blessed and protected Jerry was this year.  In Dec , when he injured his back for the umpteenth time, this last time had a bigger purpose than we knew.

Having all these months to allow for his back injury to be milder (not healed yet) but more tolerable, has been a blessing.  Having him slow down and rest was needed.  His energy has continued to decrease through the months.  His nerves have continued to shut down in areas . ONE MORE TIME of getting under a horse could have could have been detrimental to his body.  We are really thankful as we look back and see how he was protected. The time it has taken to get the medical team we have, has been worth it.  God's timing is perfect even when it has been hard. 

The day after we met the surgeon, was another reminder of trusting and seeing the Lord protect.  The news we learned from our meeting with the Surgeon opened our eyes to a future that seemed to be filled with dreams.  Jerrys health has been declining for years.  He has been limited in activities with us for most of Isaia (our 7 yr olds) life.  We left the Dr's office with so much HOPE it was overwhelming.  The thought that this injury to his spine could change so many of his symptoms and restore a life I have not seen in him in years.  We are in AWE of what the Lord has been doing in our lives and especially how he is restoring Jerry's health.  The time he has given us as a family is such a treasured gift. The journey of walking in Faith and trusting God for EVERY need we have is humbling and amazing. We feel so Blessed and Grateful each and every day.  The days of unknown are becoming  clearer , the vision of a different future for our family is so exciting. :)

Jerry was up in the early hours Wed, spending time with God, praying and praising and drawing closer to him than anything he has experienced in a long time.  It was such a spiritual breakthrough with his relationship with Our Heavenly Father  He was so renewed and excited by morning and could  not wait to go and speak to our Pastors and share his joy.  He hasn't drove much because he usually has little strength and just his pain. Plus -I do hover over him as much as I can :)

He drove the 10 minutes to church and spent some time sharing, while there he had an episode where he seemed to have lost consciousness for a little bit, though he had sat alone and no one knew. 

He later drove to a friends on a mission to deliver some Joy !!  

While there, his whole demeanor changed and he was overcome with faint feeling and then began having a seizere type episode. Medics came and brought him to ER.  I got a call saying they were calling 911, my mind froze at first then began the panic mode. * I am usually pretty on target for staying focused in difficulties but this one was more than my heart could bear.  Jerry is the Love of my love, my best friend, my right hand , my heart sank and it took my 18 yr old to take charge of the rest of the kids and direct me and drive me to the ER.(So thankful for that Boy) Now at the ER, he  then had leg tremors that would not stop fo rover half an hour.  It was hard to see him unable to control his body.  Heavy muscle relaxers were given and his body calmed down.  Most of this was considered to be because of his spine, but days of tests were done to ensure nothing else was wrong.I have said many times throughout some of our difficult times, DO not be discouraged by the Valleys , as sad and tough as they can be, there is so much beauty there.  The river is flowing , the trees bear fruit, It can be a place to sit and rest and be filled up !!  

The Olympic Mts peaking out, we live in a beautiful part of the country, don't we !!

  

Look at the view outside Jerry's window, one is the courtyartd below and one is just looking west out the window, What a beautiful blessing.  Even the time away at the hospital, although it wasn't fun and dandy, it was time.  Time together, to just focus on things without the kids and everything else that comes in.  We haven't really had time away since all this started months ago, so as hard as it was it was also good. 

We really hope that people don't feel sad for us that we are going through this season.  I do not say that it is easy, but its joy filled, Really !!  There were times this past week when the scene inside the window was not so cheerful, but oh my, what a gift to look out the window and be reminded of our great Creator whom is not surprised by any of this.  Whom created this majestic beauty outside. What a JOY giver HE is !

2 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,3 knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. James 1:2-3 (NASB)

We know this season is upon us for a reason.  Jerry had this revelation this week that yes, his body is weak, but the Lord is going to continue to use him, he just needs him strong and healthy again. AND we BELIEVE that he will be.  

This week, we are taking things slow.  There have been Dr appts and more to come before Surgery on Friday.  Jerry is mobile with the help of a walker. If I could put him in bubble wrap this week, I would have.  We are on watch 24/7 just to keep him safe.  No tripping or falling !!

Jerry was finally sitting up and feeling better this weekend. 

The surgery will be intense and he will be on heavy pain meds for the next month.  It is going to be a slow process to recovery but we are excited for the end result. We will keep our eyes on the Lord and trust that whatever comes will be his will. The Surgeon did say that there is a good probablility that all his issues will slowly resolve.  But that since his spine has been constricted for probably some time, that there is a chance things could be the same as they are.  Jerry is at a place where he is ok with that.  He knows the Lord is using this and will use it for us to be a Lighthouse to shine His love.

We have complete trust as we continue to walk this journey.

We are truly thankful for each need that is met before we even know its a need !! We have not gone without anything. We have been overwhelmed with love and support.  We are so thankful for each of you walking through this with us.  

Pray with us :

That the Lord would be seen in and through us as we go forward each day.

Pray that Peace would continue to overflow  

That HE would continue to bring healing into Jerry's body.

That HE would continue to provide every need.

That he would guide the Surgeons hands and the entire team.

That he would restore Jerrys nerve damage

That our family would continue to grow stronger

Prayers for strength and endurance as I stnd beside Jerry and care for him

Protect the kids and their hearts as they watch Dad go through this difficult time

Pray that any fears that creep in about surgery would be diminished.

Praise God for his perfect timing

Praise God for his protection over Jerry, esp. these past 5 months

We pray for each of you reading this that you may see the Love of the Lord through our journey and may yu find hope in the difficult times as well as the good times. 

Thank you each for coming alongside of us, we are so thankful for each of you .

This was alot to share but I hope you have a picture of what's going on. If you would like to send Jerry a card here is our address: if you want to connect with us just leave a comment and we will get back to you soon.

PO Box 637

Lakebay, WA 98349

Much Love and thankfulness,
Tammy,Jerry and Family